Tom Cruise Has Defective Sperm
Source: yeeeah.com
In the upcoming issue of Vanity Fair, Nicole Kidman reveals that she tried to have babies with Tom Cruise during their marriage, and only decided to adopt after failed attempts and a miscarriage. Naturally, I blame Tom — because I just knew that Suri is a goddamn Chinese baby! From People:
“From the minute Tom and I were married, I wanted to have babies,” Kidman, 40 (and 22 when she met Cruise), tells Vanity Fair for its October issue. “And we lost a baby early on, so that was really very traumatic. And that’s when we would adopt [daughter] Bella,” now 14.
In the interview, Kidman is described as cryptic when she goes on to say, “There’s a complicated background to that, given that I never speak much about many things. One day maybe that story will be told.”
Complicated? Hmm. Wonder what could possibly be so complicated about a couple of healthy, young 20-somethings trying to have a baby? Except that we all know damn well what’s so complicated and it rhymes with, “Mom Eats Hay.” Or, “Strom Bites the Sock.” The only way I could be more “cryptic” about it would be to splice together stock footage of trains entering tunnels with photos of ancient Greek wrestlers.
