Source: agentbedhead.com

Uma Thurman in the quintessential neo-noir scene from Tarantino’s Kill Bill: Vol 2.

If you came here looking for Le Blog Noir, here are links to the previous chapters, and after you finish those, click here for the final chapter.

Source: agentbedhead.com

A couple of emails have floated into my inbox, and it seems a few people have noticed that I haven’t written much this week, aside from posting the Noir. Not to worry on that note, as I’m just very tired, and the only topic I want to post about is far too depressing for anyone here to appreciate.

The Scott Peterson jury returned a death penalty sentence, not that he’ll be executed in the next thirty years or anything. (’Tis true, California averages a handful of execution each decade, although San Quentin’s Death Row grows daily.) Robert Blake is celebrating the jury’s verdict in his wife’s murder case, since the prosecution wholly failed to prove guilt beyond a reasonable doubt. Two women, both mothers, are still dead.

Another woman will soon face her untimely end, and in this case, it’s bloody clear that her husband wants to see her dead. Terri Schiavo will have her feeding tube removed at 2pm on Friday afternoon. A judge refused to issue an order that would allow Terri to stay alive while her parents pursued the appellate process, and this woman hasn’t even been granted her own attorney in the fight to keep her alive. Ahem. I do believe that is a denial of her right to due process.

If you wish to learn more or have the gumption to speak up, learn what needs to be done.

UPDATE: Jonathan over at the Galley Slaves points out a dot that I failed to connect here. Scott Peterson, a convicted murderer, is entitled to appeals automatically. On the other hand, an upstanding citizen such as Terri Schiavo isn’t entitled to squat. What’s wrong with this picture, America?

Source: www.drunkenstepfather.com

I saw this shirt and it was so ridiculously gay, that I had no choice but to post it for all you bitches. I have never been surfing, I always thought it was a sport for poofters with sun-bleached hair, rock hard bodies, amazing tans and a certain carefree attitude that would make any woman crumble to pieces in their arms. I mean….this t-shirt’s gay….

Source: www.drunkenstepfather.com

Kate Hudson is our pick for the Jewish celebrity of the week. If you didn’t know Kate is Goldie Hawn’s daughter and her father is singer Bill Hudson (not Jewish) of “The Hudson Brothers”. Goldie’s late mother was Jewish and Goldie was raised Jewish. Therefore, while Kate is Jewish by traditional Jewish religious law (ie., thorough the female line)–she is “one quarter” Jewish by ethnicity. Goldie’s late mother was very close to Kate and Goldie once referred to her mother, herself, and Kate as “three generations of strong Jewish women.” Apparently, Kate identifies as Jewish. She appeared on Regis Philbin’s show in 2002 and referred to herself during the appearance as a “bad Jewish girl”. Why? Because the appearance was on the Yom Kippur holiday when “good Jewish girls and boys” are not supposed to work.

“I’m superstitious… but not like wear the same underwear for two weeks superstitious.”

Pictures and more Quotes after the JUMP

Almost Famous

About Adam

Picture Gallery

Quotes:

“I have a big, flamboyant, open personality, which I think is why people may be saying these nice things about me. But these high expectations sometimes make me feel like I’m under a microscope–especially with my mother being who she is.”

“Sometimes I’ll be walking down the street [in France] and I’ll hear some American and I’ll just go, ‘Of course they hate us, of course they can’t stand us. We’re the most annoying, boisterous creatures in the world.’ I mean we come in and we eat mounds of food, and we’re like, ‘Where’s the ketchup for our French fries.’ I’m like, ‘Shut up.”

Last February, 2003 when Kate had just finished up filming “Le Divorce” in France.
She said she was shocked when she was in France. “I’m Jewish and this was the first time I experienced real anti-Semitism. Paris was scary…there were synagogues bombed and there was anti-Semitic graffiti all over the place. I was very angry. This is something I am passionate about.”

Source: www.drunkenstepfather.com

Adriana Lima is something kinda special. She’s a Victoria Secret model, she’s got an insane body and she just looks good. It seems like Lima’s got a little out of control bush. I don’t have a problem with a little muff, I am from the generation before bikini waxes and thongs, so I can handle it, the first girl I slept with looked like she was wearing underwear from a far.

Straight up bush isn’t trendy right now, so Lima needs to maintain her shit. Because she is in the business of being sexy.

More Pics After the Jump

Source: www.drunkenstepfather.com

I am - Where Are They Now….

Stephanie Tanner from Full House has big breasts. Mark from Home Improvement is a Hipster, probably gay.

That’s where they are now.

Source: www.drunkenstepfather.com

This has to be the weakest edible underwear concept I have seen. It’s straight up white trash underwear with candy on the straps, dude, when I think of edible underwear I got my mind on the Fruit Roll Up thong, not this trash….

I have only experienced edible underwear once, it was a hot day, and it melted down my leg, ruining my pants…it would have been embarassing if I wasn’t so drunk.

More After the Jump:

Who TastyWear.com Is:

TastyWear
“Revolution in Edible Underwear”

TastyWear is fun, flirty and sexy semi-edible lingerie that creates excitement whenever it is around. The unique, innovative styles and designs allow everyone to enjoy a TastyWear experience.

Let’s face it, we all love attention! It doesn’t matter if you are with a partner in the privacy of your own home or at the club dancing with your friends. Whatever your preference TastyWear has the flavor to accommodate your taste.

TastyWear is the perfect gift for a loved one, a friend, sister, mother’s bachelorette or bachelor party or to just wear around the house. TastyWear brings to life an experience of adventure, experimentation and delight! The versatile wash and wear design invites you to continuously take pleasure in your panties even after the candy has been enjoyed.

TastyWear is bringing to life thrilling new products including an assortment of thong and bikini bottom panties, t-shirts, and tank tops. We welcome and encourage you to discover TastyWear and all the possibilities it has to offer!

Testimonials:

heck out the fun and exciting comments customers are saying about TastyWear
“During my 7th year of marriage my husband and I, were experiencing a lull in our sex life. After finding TastyWear online, I purchased the panties to wear during our vacation to Florida. Not only did he love the way the panties looked but also he said the candy was delicious! I recommend TastyWear to anyone who wants to bring fun in to the bed room and have cute panties to wear after.”

Sue - 34 years old
Minneapolis, MN
“My friends and I were the talk of the town when we wore our TastyWear out on a Friday night. Men and women both loved it! The fun and excitement around us was worth a million bucks.”

Joni - 24 years old
San Diego, CA
“As the maid of honor for my best friend, I wanted to do something original for the bachelorette party. I am so sick of the penis straws women give to their girlfriends during bachelorette parties. I decided to give the bride to be a pair of Bridal Lace TastyWear and purchased other styles for the rest of the bridal party. The TastyWear experience made the bachelorette party!”

Casey - 28 years old
Austin, TX
“All I have to say is, TastyWear will be joining me on every trip to Las Vegas from now on!”

Carrie - 22 years old
Tucson, AZ
“Purchasing TastyWear was a stretch for me. I have always walked the conservative line but when I saw the cute panties I just had to buy them. Not only did I feel sexy but I had sex that was actually fun!”

Deanna - 30 years old
Boise, ID
“Even though the candy is gone, every time I put on my TastyWear, I relive the experience.”

Heather - 27 years old
Philadelphia, PA

Source: www.drunkenstepfather.com

Yes, it is true, controversy is me. We all know les Francais (The French) are absurdly crazy, wine n’cheese eating bastards. We can accept that, oui? But when freedom of speech is being infringed, it is our civic duty as les Americain Libre (Free), to post about it.

This beautiful advertisment, which speaks about the state of the woman in society, has been banned by a court in France as being “a gratuitous and aggressive act of intrusion on people’s innermost beliefs.”

Last time I was intruded, it had nothing to do with supper but alot to do with meat.
Bisou, you freedom-fries eating pipe smokers.

BBC Article

French court bans Christ advert

Source: www.drunkenstepfather.com

Lohan is a coke slut anyway you dice it, but I like to think that she’s our coke slut. She is filming in NYC and these are some paparazzi pics of her coming or going, she can barely decide, from the set. She’s got an obnoxious dog, the accessory of the year, that if fed proper shits gold. She is also rocking a hot pair of Chanel gloves and seems to have a little something up her nose, but that could just be my fantasies, I got a thing for girls with coke crusted snot….

More pics after the jump….

Source: www.drunkenstepfather.com

I am overjoyed to announce that Ebay has a new Jewish Competitor. As many of you know I am a Jewish lawyer and represent Jesus and his brother Hector. As such one of my jobs is to report on Jewish matters and news. Jewbay is the newest auction site and it focuses on products for the Jews. Items up for auction include a keychain from Ken’s dinner one of the most famous kosher resteraunts also available is a silver washing cup. Happy Kosher Bidding!!

Visit Jewbay

Source: www.drunkenstepfather.com

Boutique hotels are for homos. If I wasn’t living in a shit hole, working a shit job, living a shit life, having a shitty bank balance and even shittier credit card statement, I would be chillin’ in an Haute Couture hotel, something designed by a fashion designer, not some hipster who likes mirrors a little more than he should.

Christian Lacroix designed the interior of the Paris Hotel Petit Moulin,

Pictures and Link After the Jump

Visit the Petit Moulin

Source: www.drunkenstepfather.com

Desperate is a show designed for women unhappy in their lives. It is a mechanism for them to realize living in the fucking suburbs can be exciting and that the hot plumber across the street, who has a gun and wads of cash, wants their pussy too. It’s a predictable piece of shit, but it has brought Eva Longoria back into the limelight. She first dated a backstreet boy, now the rumor is she’s dating Fez, Lohan’s ex. All I have to say about suburbia is that when I was younger, a nice married woman was always a great fuck, while the husband was at work and the kids were at school. I remember having to hide in the closet once, when the husband stopped by for a quickie. Watching that married couple go at it, was inspiration for me to never get married, but I did it anyway. I am crazy like that….

Eva Longoria Pics - After the Jump