I am - Kate Moss and Some Simon and Garfunkle Motherfucker of the Day
Source: www.drunkenstepfather.com
Last night I got to talking with a couple of guys from the park about how young girls are shitty in bed. They were telling me that they would never fuck anyone under 22 because 95% of people under 22 don’t know how to fuck and it’s too risky invest time into a chick trying to land the 5% of quality that’s out there. I told them that I would only fuck girls under 22 if I could because they have tighter bodies than girls who are older than 22 and all the girls I ever fucked were shitty in bed anyways because I used the date rape drug.
The dudes then went into how they used to bang models and that models are shit in bed no matter what age because models are too concerned with being pretty and well positioned to get on all fours and take it like a man…I mean…woman…. I didn’t agree, because the models I see are usually not all the hot or put together, they just clean up nicely for pictures but really like going out and getting fucked up, and drunk party sluts who are high always means a decent fuck that ends with her puking all over your chest because the first video I ever saw on a computer was two Asians in a bathtub puking on each other and since then it’s been a fetish or a curse…
Speaking of puking models, here’s Kate Moss with some chinless Simon and Garfunkle motherfucker who looks like he’s eating his face because I love Kate Moss and because we decided she’d be a good fuck while talkin’. What were you doing with your night? Don’t answer that because I don’t really care, I was just proving that I have way more stimulating and exciting nights than you because people actually talk to me. Cuddles.
