Source: www.derekhail.com

Kelly Brook posed for the October 2009 issue of Loaded Magazine. I’ll be buying a hard copy. I look at that main picture, and I can practically hear that chick inviting me in. Maybe to help her finish undressing. For those tits, I’d be only too happy to oblige. Admit it, wouldn’t you?

Source: www.derekhail.com

As far as I can tell from these pictures, Kelly Brook got on a boat and decided to have a lingerie fashion show. It’s the only type of fashion show I’d watch. And enjoy it.  Kelly would make a great Victoria’s Secret Angel.

Source: www.derekhail.com

Now, I’m not sure I’d generally choose to go sunbathing in Arizona. You know, it’s in the middle of the desert. However. If Kelly Brook was there looking this hot, I’d make an exception.

Especially if I could rub sun lotion on her. I’d be sure not to miss a spot.

Source: www.derekhail.com

Kelly Brook (red bikini) and Riley Steele (blue bikini) appear to be very good friends. Hanging out on a boat. But they’re missing something. Or rather:  someone. They need a third person to make it a trio! (Just ignore that lucky bastard in the background.)

I’d be happy to oblige! Unless they have another hot friend who can come. Then I can be their personal photographer.

Source: www.derekhail.com

Kelly Brook is single and she’s letting everyone know it by walking around sharing her cleavage with the world.  Boy….she looks great.  You know what, it’s Friday.  I’m ready for Happy Hour and I am totally phoning it in today. I could go on and on about how I would love to motorboat Kelly Brook or how I would let Tito Ortiz kick me in the nuts just for a shot to bang her, but you’ve heard all that before.  I’ll spare you.

Source: www.derekhail.com

I guess Kelly Brook is back with Billy Zane after their little split up.

For her part, Kelly has been rather enjoying the attention since news of their split made headlines, and the 28-year-old could be relied on to beam for the cameras.

The truth about the couple’s reunion may not be entirely clearly, but they looked relaxed enough together at the exclusive Century Club at the Cannes Film Festival.

She is still not wearing her £35,000 ring and is understood to want to things more slowly this time around. It has been claimed that Billy is keen to get the wedding back on track as soon as possible.

The couple were pictured back in each other’s arms last week after splitting up three weeks earlier.

Miss Brook cut short a holiday with friends in Cornwall and flew to London to meet Billy.

I guess once you lose your hair, the last thing you want to do is lose your woman, especially if your woman happens to be one of the hottest on the planet. 

I mean seriously, if you could have the video below every night would you give it up?

Completely NSFW Kelly Brook Video after the jump.

Source: www.derekhail.com

I’m not sure but I think I can see a nipple through Kelly Brook’s turtleneck.  That’s when you know you have big boobs, when you try to cover them up but they still manage to be the center of attention.  She’s been all smiles lately.  I guess now that she’s single she likes the flash of the paparazzi cameras.  Either that, or the fact that she’ll never have to see Billy Zane nude again is making her ecstatic.

Source: www.derekhail.com

Now that Kelly Brook is single again she’s pulling all her old hot clothes out of the closet.  So why did she choose these mom jeans?  Granted she still looks great, but mom jeans aren’t hot.  I didn’t even know they still sold the things.  I’m pretty sure JC Penney took them off their shelves in 1990.

Source: www.derekhail.com

A recently single Kelly Brook attended some event in a tight orange dress showing off her curves. Kelly is one of those hot chicks a regular guy can probably nail simply because her standards have to be rock bottom. Billy Zane? That dude was bald and had a gut. I have a full head of hair and I don’t have a gut. I also like chicks with big boobs. It seems like a match made in heaven.

Source: www.derekhail.com

It seems Kelly Brook is through being engaged to Billy Zane.

A source told The Sun: “After much soul-searching, Kelly decided that Billy is not the man she wants to marry and has called off the engagement.

“The split is completely amicable and the decision was made after long conversations here and in the US. They remain good friends.

Kelly is pretty much only known for her humongous rack.    I can’t remember her ever being in a movie or singing a song, only for her topless bikini pictures or lingerie modeling.  Hopefully, she’ll add whorefully dating Hollywood startlett to her resume.  With her type being Billy Zane though, she’ll probably end up dating Jason Alexander.

Source: www.derekhail.com

Let’s see if you can figure out what’s wrong with this picture.  It’s not the fact that a hottie like Kelly Brook is with a fat, balding dude.  That would be the obvious choice.  No it’s something more subtle.

Source: www.drunkenstepfather.com

I saw some more pictures of Kelly Brook in some dated ill-fitting bikini that I was going to post asking why the fuck every site is posting pictures of this bitch when no one knows who the fuck she is, but then I came across her topless pictures and figured that it doesn’t matter who the fuck she is, what does matter is that she’s half naked and that’s all a girl needs to do to get on this site. So if it’s always been your dream to have me write about you, all you gotta do is get naked but after you do that, we’re going to have to have a talk and work on the reasons why you have such shitty dreams…

Bonus – Her Shitty Dated Ill-Fitting Bikini