Source: www.drunkenstepfather.com

This is the girl who was on the show Step by Step that I used to jerk off to because TGIF was my porn before the internet and Step by Step was one of my favorites but that’s just because I have a thing for extended families, you know with being a stepfather and all. If you don’t remember this shit, it was on every friday and a slutty Susanne Somers was married to Pat Duffy and had a bunch of kids and this Christine Lakin was one of them.

She’s in Paris Hilton’s new movie that I want to pretend doesn’t exist and she plays Paris Hilton’s ugly friend, which is a joke in and of itself because Paris Hilton isn’t hot and Lakin is. Paris reminds me of this pet bird I used to have that was missing an eye because the cat got at her, only my bird had a little more class and the only sleazy thing it did was shit in its cage, and never even considered sucking dick on camera, but to be fair to Paris, my bird never really had the opportunity…..

Either way, Lakin is in FHM in a bikini and you’ll want to fuck her on camera while Paris Hilton direct, but you’ll never have that chance, so masturbating to these pics may be the closest you’ll ever get and I am glad to be a part of it even though being part of your masturbating kinda makes me feel uncomfortable and even a little homo. Cuddles.

To See the Rest of the Christine Lakin Pics from FHM
GO

Source: www.drunkenstepfather.com

These are pictures of Paris Hilton hanging out with Christine Lakin dressed in character from Paris Hilton’s new movie she produced called “The Hottie and the Nottie” and I can only assume that since it is a Paris Hilton production, Paris is the Hottie and this Lakin chick is the Nottie and this is her in costume.

Now I’ve heard of chicks taking on a job and that makes them do humiliating shit that isn’t in the job description, like jerking off the manager in the back room after hours, or dressing in pretty revealing clothes, or paying picking up the bosses dry cleaning but going out in costume lookin like a wreck is on a whole other level of shit.

I can only assume that Paris isn’t paying this chick for making a fool of herself to help promote the movie, I have a feeling that Paris just told her that if she wants to hang out with her and if she ever wants to work in the industry again she has to dress in character or else she can just stay at home and kiss her career goodbye and a star struck Lakin who was casted by Paris and thinks she owes her, took one for the team and this is the humilating result.

I guess none of that matters, because a fake ugly Lakin, she still looks better than anything I’ve ever fucked and I know that all I have to do is let down her greasy hair and scrape off those skin lesions and she’d be good to go, not that I’d put that much effort into her, I’m more of a lift up that skirt and bend you over the hood kind of guy.

Source: www.drunkenstepfather.com

This girls name is Christine Lakin, I had never heard of her, but didn’t really care because after seeing the pictures I figured she was worth a post on a girl you thought you never heard of but would jerk off to if you saw her naked.

It turns out she was on the show Step by Step in the 90s. I spent most of the 90s fucked up, but that never stopped me from strapping in on Friday nights at 8 pm to watch ABC’s TGIF. I was all about Boy Meets World, Full House and my favorite shit was Step by Step with Suzanne Sommer’s tits. It was the perfect gateway show to harder drugs and a good way to get my weekends on a role. That moral at the end of every show made me realize why I drank and slept with hookers.

Speaking of being someone no one knows, I went out last night and started talking to random people who were asking me about what I do, because it seems like that’s what people like to know about a person. I told them that I run the hottest website on the internet that nobody reads and none of them had ever heard of the website. I wasn’t surprised because if it was the hottest site that everyone read, I’d be living in a much nicer shitbox of an apartment. I also learned that when you tell girls you want to make them famous on the internet they generally don’t get naked in excitement and kinda just give you dirty looks acting like you just asked them to take 2 dicks in their ass on video and walk away disgusted, even when you tell them your site was voted number 1 in the city, they keep on walking because no one gives a fuck about a number 1 rated site, because the internet is fucking lame. I also realized that cocaine is a lot bigger than it was when I was too poor to do it back in my Step by Step years, when I would have welcomed it with open arms. There was constant line-ups to the bathroom and my little bladder and big drinking stomach couldn’t handle it. I didn’t piss myself but I did blame Lohan for fuckin’ up all these kids and ruining public bathrooms in bars internationally….