Archive for August 6th, 2008

Shia LaBeouf Might Lose a Finger

Source: www.celebritysmackblog.com

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Star magazine is reporting that Shia LaBeouf might lose one of his fingers on the hand that was seriously injured in his recent DUI accident.

A source on the set of his current film, Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen, says the actor will probably end up losing the pinkie finger on his left hand.

Producers working on the film learned about the possible amputation yesterday. “Shia called producers yesterday and told them. It’s really thrown the movie into turmoil.”

UPDATE:

A paps agency I don’t like is reporting that Shia’s rep says the story is “an absolute fabrication.”

Flashback to 1988..

Source: www.celebritysmackblog.com

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Check out these stars as they looked 20-years ago!

Do you recognize them all?

vanessa-w-88downey-slater-88sjp-88curtis-88prince-w-88pitt-applegate-88baio-sheridan-88oprah-88haim-milano-88

Published on August 6th, 2008 in 80s, I Love the 80's, Retro

Jenna Jameson is Knocked Up

Source: www.celebritysmackblog.com

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Porn star Jenna Jameson is reportedly pregnant with her boyfriend, Tito Ortiz’s child.

Jenna, who has had a couple of failed pregnancies in the past, is thrilled.

A source told the NY Post, “She had a bunch of meetings and things planned for Fashion Week, including meetings for her own line, but she’s postponed everything. She’s completely thrilled, this is something she’s wanted for a very long time.”

I am just shocked that her ratty ol’ clam could produce a child!

Published on August 6th, 2008 in Jenna Jameson, Porn Stars, Pregnancy, Pregnant Celebrities, Tito Ortiz

Kevin Smith Gets Away With Porn

Source: www.derekhail.com

Kevin Smith uses his smooth talking skills and his girlish figure to win him the rating of R, instead of NC-17, for his up and coming film: Zach and Miri Make a Porno. Some of the MPAA ratings board argued that some of the scenes were just a little too raunchy to casually just stand in the “R” line.

“Anybody not inclined to see a movie with `Porno’ in the title is not going to see it, so it kind of regulates itself to a degree,” Smith said. “And anybody who is going is not going to be surprised by what they see.”

I think you’re missing the point, Mr. Smith. It’s not that we’re trying to keep those uptight Christians out there satisfied, we just want to make sure that if a eleven year old is going to see his first pair of honkers, it’s going to have to be their teacher’s on that afternoon she asks him to stay after school for a little one-on-one practice. Those soft-core R-rated sex scenes are really only there to pique and fuel the curiosity for when that one fateful day comes around.

Published on August 6th, 2008 in The Other Celebrity Planet

Shia LaBeouf Headed for Rehab?

Source: www.celebritysmackblog.com

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Shia LaBeouf may be headed to rehab soon, an effort to reduce or beat his drunk driving charges.

LaBeouf, 22, crushed his hand in the accident and required surgery. He was released from the hospital last weekend and has been told he should do the rehab thing in order to help his case.  But not because he is a drunk or anything..

He is due in court later this month.

{WENN]

Published on August 6th, 2008 in Celebs in Rehab, Drunk Celebs, Shia LaBeouf, car accident, rehab

Morgan Freeman and Wife Divorcing

Source: www.celebritysmackblog.com

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Just days after being involved in a serious car accident with a lady friend, Morgan Freeman has confirmed that he and his wife are getting a divorce after 24 years of marriage.

Apparently the couple have been separated since December of last year, and the accident, or his female passenger, Demaris Meyer, were not the reason for the split.

Freeman and Meyer were headed to his home Sunday night when the actor’s car went off the road and rolled.  The two had to be removed from the vehicle by the jaws of life and were airlifted to a nearby hospital.

Published on August 6th, 2008 in Celebrity Divorce, Morgan Freeman, divorce

Artie Lange Finally Checks in to Rehab

Source: www.celebritysmackblog.com

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Artie Lange, sidekick on the Howard Stern Show, has checked into intensive outpatient rehab for substance abuse.

Lange, 40, has struggled with narcotic addiction for years and has been to rehab many times before.

It seems he’s back to his old ways.

Last April he walked off the air after having an physical altercation with an assistant and it was thought he may have been using again.

Artie has been very open about his drug use, telling listeners story after story about being drunk to snorting cocaine and heroin.

I hope the guy gets clean, because yeah, he’s funny. But he’s also a fat f***ing loser. His mom still cleans his apartment and brings him food..

He’s just lucky enough to have Howard there to deal with his shit, because not many other employers would put up with him. He’ll eventually end up a nobody, a washed up old comic. Then maybe he’ll realize how good he had it.

[WENN]


Dr. Dre’s Gonna Get You Crunk

Source: www.derekhail.com

For all those party fans out there, Dr Dre plans on coming out with his own pimp juice:

Aftermath Congac will come out first, followed by an 80-proof flavored and unflavored sparkling vodka, Drinks America said Monday in its fourth-quarter earnings statement.

It added that the marketing for the beverages will be tied in with the release of Dr. Dre’s long awaited “Detox” album.

This is the chance of the lifetime for everyone to party like a true rock star! Buy his drink, drink his drink, bang skanky whores, and then after carrying around like that for a couple of months, get your celebrity Dr I’m-not-one-but-I-play-one-on-tv Dre, to encourage you to turn your life around and go into rehab. However, for that HIV you’ve contracted, you’re on your own buddy.

Published on August 6th, 2008 in Dr. Dre

The Gossip Rags Already Have John & Jen Married With Children!

Source: www.celebritysmackblog.com

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For all of you who adore Jennifer Aniston and John Mayer together, I’m sorry..

I am just not buying that this couple is going to get married and squirt out some big nosed little pimps anytime soon. Or ever!

Ok! is reporting that the couple have plans for a Fall wedding.

Being as Jen was married once already and had quite the elaborate ceremony, she’s supposedly planning a very small, intimate setting this time around. BFF Courteney Cox and family would attend, of course, with Coco as the flower girl.

Then Star magazine takes it a step further and says that Jen and John are already planning for babies!

The publication claims that John and Jen are convinced the other is “the one” and that Jen feels now is her time to shine.

A source told the magazine that Jen would love Brad to see her holding her baby on magazine covers - instead of the other way around. Now there’s a great reason to have a baby - retaliation!

Anyhow, I am not buying any of it. Let’s see if they make it until next month first…

Published on August 6th, 2008 in Celebrity Love, Jennifer Aniston, John Mayer, Love, Magazine Covers, weddings

Paris Hilton Snaps Back

Source: www.derekhail.com

After last weeks campaign video where McCain accuses Obama of merely being an international celebrity whore like Paris Hilton, Paris lashes back at McCain on the internet yesterday with a little promo of her own:

In it, Hilton lays out her point-by-point energy proposal, after reading an article on where to get the best tan. She muses about painting the White House pink, and then signs out with a semi-traditional campaign disclaimer.

The future I would imagine with Paris Hilton in the White House seems okay. God knows watching her prance around in a bikini beats floral pantsuits any day. I would sit diligently in front of the television just to see how many trouser snakes she has mongled for the day, or which nipple she decides to press against the glass window of the Oval Office for the paparazzi to see. It would be like watching a mother give birth to the swamp thing: so horrible, but for some demented reason you can’t turn away.

See more Paris Hilton videos at Funny or Die
Published on August 6th, 2008 in Paris Hilton

Britney Spears Puts Talent to Good Use

Source: www.derekhail.com

Quentin Tarantino is allegedly reported to have handpicked the talented song bird Britney Spears to play…yeah you guessed it, a killer lesbian stripper for his up and coming film remake Faster Pussycat! Kill! Kill!

Spears’ character murders the boyfriend with her bare hands before taking the girlfriend hostage. The troubled singer will also have sex scenes with another girl before the drama ends in a blood-bath.

A source said: “Quentin is convinced Britney will be brilliant. She’s delighted. She thinks it could turn her career around.

…What? Career? Around? Those seem to me to be the kind words someone offers a complete stranger before kicking them out of a speeding vehicle. “YOU WERE MADE TO DO THIS. YOU’LL BE GREAT.” kick. And then you are left rolling on asphalt and being left behind to be consumed by hyenas.

I’m sure somewhere in a basement bathing in a pool of liquid gold is a Tarantino laughing his balls off over how gullible delicate psychopath flowers like Spears can be.

Published on August 6th, 2008 in Britney Spears

Jennifer Aniston is a tight ass

Source: www.derekhail.com

It’s no secret that Jennifer Aniston is a fun party girl.  Oh wait, I meant to say Uptight Super Bitch.  Sorry about that. I would much rather see her from this angle all the time, that way we don’t have to see her sourpuss face.  Maybe she’s standing like that so the stick will fall out of there.  God knows it’s been lodged in her ass long enough.

Published on August 6th, 2008 in Jennifer Aniston