Source: www.celebritysmackblog.com

On this week’s Heyman Hustle, Paul Heyman catches up with Coco and Ice-T at Coco’s 29th birthday party at Plumm in NYC.

Paul’s usually the one doing the hustling, but this time, I think Coco owns him.

Paul asks Coco what it is about Ice-T that keeps the sex kitten so happy. Grinning, she eagerly tells him that it’s a little thing called ‘The Stroke’. She adds that Ice-T surprises her with a new stroke every once in awhile. She never gets into the meat of it, but it seems everyone at the party knows what she’s talking about except Paul.

It’s probably something to do with that ass of hers. You know that’s got the be the focal point of their sex life. Heh.

When asked about the stroke, Ice-T said that sex is 90% mental and that he merely has Coco tricked into thinking his is “something special”.

I was especially entertained by Coco’s measurements, which are appropriately listed just before her pole dancing scene.

Height: 5′2″
Weight: 130
Cup Size: 39DD
Waist: 23″
Hips: 40″

If Barbie was 5′2″, she’d have nothing on Coco.

Ready to see for yourself? You know you want to.

Check it all out HERE.

Source: www.yeeeah.com

People actually tuned in to watch Britney Spears’ bit part on “How I Met Your Mother” Monday night — according to the Hollywood Reporter, her guest role gave the CBS sitcom its highest rating ever. Right behind “The New Adventures of Old Christine” and Tampax commercials, I’m sure. Anyway, how did our favorite trainwreck get along with the cast? MSBNC says

A source close to Spears said that the role was very carefully chosen, and… production had [to agree] to be sensitive toward Spears and avoid “trigger” topics. “The folks on set… weren’t to bring up her music career [or] her kids. [They] said [that] they just wanted her to be treated normally, but obviously this wasn’t a normal situation.”

I, too, have a number of trigger topics that are not to be broached. The limp, for starters. Most of 1998. The public urination arrests. That Russian pantyhose fetish site and the fire at the Howard Johnson’s. Spectacled bears. In most situations it’s best to just feed me grain alcohol and lay me on the floor on my side so I don’t aspirate my own vomit. Bunker reality? More like “barely reality!” Psychoanalytic Theory can suck it.

Admiral Avoidance leaving Dominik’s Tuesday:

Source: www.celebritysmackblog.com

Ok, none of us could believe it when Spencer Pratt landed a gig on Radar.com as an advice columnist, but it’s true, he has, and his first column has arrived.

The first dilemma he has to solve is pretty funny and disgusting at the same time. In fact, it’s a real pisser. Check it out.

YO SPENCER! I just started dating this guy who I really like. The other night, we went out and got hammered. I ended up passing out in his bed. When I woke up, I discovered that I had wet the bed. I was so embarrassed that I left while he was still asleep. If I call him, do I have to apologize or can I pretend it never happened? Or do I have to wait for him to call me?

Oh my gawd. Talk about embarrassing, bitch should do nothing short of moving to another state. Here’s Spencer’s advice:

Wow! This is a situation you do not want to find yourself in. I personally would never want to be with a girl who gets so wasted that she’s pissing in bed. It’s time to sign up for AA, my dear, because drunks are not sexy. Regardless, if the guy’s really, really, really cool, he might understand. But I wouldn’t count on it. Best bet is to be honest and tell him that was the drunkest you’ve ever been and that it was a huge mistake and it’ll never happen again. And make sure you buy him new sheets.

The guy is NOT going to understand. She says she just started dating him, she should consider that date her last. And what the hell, taking off before he wakes up and leaving him sleeping in a piss stained bed? Sorry about your luck sweetheart, but everyone this guy knows is going to know that you pissed his bed. Sorry about your luck!

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Source: www.celebritysmackblog.com

Source: www.celebritysmackblog.com

These photos of Michael Jackson’s Neverland Ranch are actually quite beautiful - but also a tad eerie. But the lavishness of it all is amazing.

You can find tons more photographs of the estate here.

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Source: www.celebritysmackblog.com

“I eat more than anyone I have ever seen. I eat M&Ms, cake and chips, but I’m still skinny. It drives the other girls mad. I can eat anything and never get fat.”

- Eva Longoria brags that she doesn’t need to diet to maintain her petite figure.

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Source: yeeeah.com

Lindsay Lohan continued her oh-so-subtle promotion of the smokeless tobacco product Arriva yesterday by walking around with the box strategically placed to reveal the brand name. Hard up for cash after a string of flops and multiple trips to rehab, the Firecrotch has resorted to paparazzi-centered product placement to earn her coke money. I can’t imagine Arriva will see any real increase in sales, though, considering when she’s not playing billboard whore, she’s usually smoking cigarettes or putting out cigarettes or lighting cigarettes. It’d really make more sense to try to secure a spot as the unofficial face of Lifestyles brand condoms or RU-486. Now that the public could probably swallow. Pun intended!

Your name here:

Source: agentbedhead.com

Remember Knut, the terrifyingly adorable polar bear cub who won German hearts almost as effortlessly as Der Fuehrer? Well, Knut isn’t a cub anymore, and like many former child stars, his transition to adulthood is proving to be a bit rocky. In fact, Knut’s keeper describes the husky young carnivore as “a publicity-addicted psycho” whose mental health is deteriorating by the day. According to keeper Markus Roebke:

We are not allowed to have contact with him any more and have received letters that if we breach this order our jobs are on the line. He is too unpredictable to play with now. He is addicted to the whole show, the human adulation. It is not healthy. He actually cries out or whimpers if he sees that there is not a spectator outside his enclosure ready to ooh and aah at him.

Presumably it’s just a matter of time before Knut learns to get the crowd’s attention by flashing his genitals at them. Then, a few months after that, comes the head-shaving. Eventually he might regain a tiny scrap of his dignity by making a guest appearance on How I Met Your Mother, but I wouldn’t count on it. These comparisons can only be pushed so far.

Source: agentbedhead.com

Say what you will about the internet—with its annoying spammers, its torrent of pr0n, its snidely smartass bloggers cracking wise about celebrities and pop culture—it’s still an unparalleled educational tool. Take Miss Bimbo, for instance. The RPG website is aimed at girls 9 to 16, and in the last month 200,000 of them have signed up to learn valuable real world skills. As the game says: “Don’t forget that the aim is to be the coolest, richest, and most famous bimbo in the whole world/game. In order to do this, you must complete the Goals!” From the link:

Level 7
After you broke up with your boyfriend you went on an eating binge! Now it’s time to diet . . . Your target weight is less than 132lbs
Level 9
Have a nip and tuck operation for a brand new face. You’ve found work as a plus-size model. To gain those vivacious curves, you need to weigh more than 154lbs
Level 10
Summertime is coming up and bikini weather is upon us. You want to turn heads on the beach don’t you?
Level 11
Bigger is better! Have a breast operation
Level 17
There is a billionaire on vacation . . . You must catch his eye and his love! Good luck

Boob jobs cost 11,500 bimbo dollars and earn the implantee 2000 bimbo attitude points, which make it easier to pick up virtual Brandon Davises in the game’s various virtual clubs. Text messaging on the site costs three real-world dollars a pop, but at least parents can rest easy knowing their money is being spent to train a corps of strong, resourceful celebutards for the next generation.

Source: www.celebritysmackblog.com

Jamie Lynn Spears has no idea what life is all about.

I remember when I was 16, I thought I wanted kids and to be married by like, 23. Because that was sooo far away. Heh. Thank God I never had any kids, and I didn’t marry until I was 31. My point? You change a lot from your teen years to your 30s. A lot.

So Jamie Lynn is reportedly engaged to Casey Aldridge, who probably isn’t even the baby’s dad. The poor kid has probably been drug into all this after some loose zippered Nickelodeon Exec impregnated her. I wonder how much Casey is getting paid off to take the fall?

Anyhow, Jamie’s been sporting a new ring and has been showing it off to friends. She must feel so grown up. Big sister Britney must be so proud.

I hear Jamie’s hoping for a baby girl so she, Sean and Jayden can all have babies together. You know, keeping those blood lines pure, y’all.

Source

Source: www.yeeeah.com

Demi Moore was on The Late Show with David Letterman last night promoting her new movie “Flawless,” but the bulk of the interview was spent talking about how she’s started detoxifying herself with leeches. That’s right — bloodletting. Just like in ancient times! She says

These aren’t just swamp leeches. We are talking about highly trained medical leeches… high level blood suckers. They have a little enzyme that… gets released in your blood and generally you bleed for quite a bit and your health is optimized. It detoxifies your blood. I did it in some woman’s house laying on her bed. We did a little sampler first, which is in the belly button. It crawls in and you feel it bite down on you and you want to go, ‘You bastard.’ Then you relax and work on your Lamaze breathing just to kind of relax. You watch it swell up on your blood, get fatter and fatter, then when it’s super-drunk on your blood, it just kind of rolls over like it is stumbling out of the bar.”

And her secret cure for unsightly breakouts and blemishes? A thorough application of egg whites, one barelycorn of treacle and shaving the sign of the cross on your scalp while facing east in a crimson robe. For more beauty tips like these, check out Dioscorides’ “De Materia Medica.” At a medieval library near you!

Arriving at The Late Show:

Source: www.celebritysmackblog.com

By now I’m sure you have heard Heidi Montag’s new single ‘No More’, the lovely follow up to the much mocked & talked about, ‘Higher’.

Once again Heidi’s voice is heavily doctored and made to sound like a synthesizer. (I guess it’s called a vocoder.) After reading a little bit about what this machine does, it’s apparent that it’s the one doing most of the singing. But unfortunately it’s using her voice to do it.

Come on SNL, invite this bitch on then miraculously have an Ashlee Simpson malfunction! Ratings, people, ratings!

Anyhow, in case you haven’t already, go listen to the crap. You can’t talk sh*t about it unless you’ve heard it.. Heh.

I can’t wait for the video.

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