Archive for March, 2008

MTV to Paula Abdul: Straight Up, You Blow!

Source: www.celebritysmackblog.com

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Paula Abdul may have been able to promote her new music video, ‘Dance Like There’s No Tomorrow’, on the uber-popular American Idol, but that doesn’t mean MTV is willing to put it into their rotation.

“There are currently no plans to play the video.” - MTV spokesperson.

MTV is refusing to play the video, and if you have heard the song or seen the video you can probably figure out why.

She’s never been known for her strong voice, and in her new single it sounds like it was ran through some sort of thick voice synthesizer or something. Basically, it sounds nothing like her.

Props to MTV for knowing a joke when they see it.  And just when you thought they didn’t know anything about music anymore..  Heh.

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Published on March 4th, 2008 in All Washed Up, MTV, Music, Paula Abdul

Vanity Fair’s Tribute to the Women of Comedy

Source: www.celebritysmackblog.com

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Vanity Fair spotlights funny women in it’s upcoming April issue. Tina Fey, Sarah Silverman and Amy Poehler adorn the cover as the Queens of Comedy.

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Sarah does her best Amy Winehouse, which I thought was perfect because I have mentioned in the past how much they look alike. Jenna Fischer is Lindsay Lohan (center) and Wanda Sykes channels Lil Kim. Chelsea Handler (second from left) and Sandra Bernhard (left) are also spotlighted.

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Celebrity Quote of the Day - Dita Von Teese

Source: www.celebritysmackblog.com

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Dita pictured in her 1990 high school yearbook and recently. [Splash via DailyMail.co.uk]

“As soon as I was of legal age I wanted to take my clothes off and be photographed recreating old pin-ups.”

- Soon after Dita Von Teese graduated high school, she began her transformation into the world famous burlesque dancer she is today.

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Published on March 4th, 2008 in Celebrity Quotes, Dita Von Teese, Models & Supermodels, Retro

Paparazzi Harrass Tonya Harding at the Airport

Source: www.celebritysmackblog.com

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Tonya Harding has long been a favorite of the paparazzi and they seem to try their best to capture her in awkward and unflattering situations.

This time it was at Bob Hope airport where Tonya was filmed eating and having a beer before a flight to Portland. Before she knew she was being filmed she blew her nose and chewed her food with her mouth open.

After the cameraman made it obvious he was filming her she got a little peeved after she kept running into him. Tonya flipped off the camera and complained on numerous occasions to security before finally escaping the paps lens.

Although it’s mildly entertaining to watch her patience grow thinner and thinner I can’t help think about what a pain in the ass it would be to have to deal with that. I’d probably end up going Sean Penn on their ass.

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Published on March 4th, 2008 in Dumb Bitches, Not Worth Their Own Category, Paparazzi, Videos

Heidi Montag’s Stepbrother Dies

Source: www.celebritysmackblog.com

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Heidi Montag’s stepbrother Eric O’Hara, 24, died last Thursday while working on an icy roof in Colorado.

Eric was a member of the 82nd Airborne Division and a veteran of Iraq and Afghanistan. He was discharged from the Army only one month ago.

While working on the icy roof of the Steamboat Grand Resort Hotel, Eric was changing position when he released a safety clip. Unfortunately, it was at that moment that a piece of ice broke, sending him sliding down and over the roof.

Heidi has released the following statement:

“Losing my brother, at an early age is such a tragedy. I just loved him more than anything. He was just so patriotic. He really wanted to go to Iraq and help and do all that he could for his country. He felt like it was his duty. I’ll really miss him.”

Terribly tragic and ironic..and a terrible way to die. Although I usually mock Heidi when I write about her, this is no laughing matter. I feel terrible for anyone who loses a loved one, especially tragically.

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Related News: Soldiers Gathering to Say Goodbye

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Hillary Clinton on SNL

Source: www.celebritysmackblog.com

In case you missed it, here is Hillary Clinton on last weekend’s Saturday Night Live.

TMZ reported that Hillary was totally cool with the entire SNL skit and didn’t request any script changes, which was shocking. She had a good time with it and left shortly after her appearance.

Published on March 4th, 2008 in Celebrity Parodies, SNL, Videos

Kate Hudson Bikini Pictures

Source: www.yeeeah.com

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Don’t be afraid, dear readers — that babushka in the big glasses doesn’t want to make a hearty stew of your children. That’s because the crone pictured above is none other than actress Kate Hudson on vacation in Miami. Now, I know what you’re thinking: how do I know that’s not really a Yugoslavian fishwife disguised as Kate Hudson? It sure looks like a Yugoslavian fishwife. The trick here is the ass. If the ass looks like it belongs under a rainbow nestled on a cushion of rose petals surrounded by doe-eyed forest creatures, it’s Kate Hudson. If it looks like sourdough starter that’s been pounded with a meat tenderizer and stretched a good city block, then it’s an Eastern Bloc ogress. Feel free to write this down to keep in your wallet for reference in emergencies.

More ass-tastic Kate yesterday:

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Published on March 4th, 2008 in Ass, Bikini, Gossip, Kate Hudson, Miami, Owen Wilson, Pregnant, Thong

Amy Winehouse’s Contagious Skin Infection Most Likely Due to Cutting

Source: www.celebritysmackblog.com

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Amy Winehouse has been diagnosed with ‘impetigo‘, a highly contagious bacterial skin infection.

I had to learn a little more about this infection and what causes it, and my suspicions were correct. Her cutting herself combined with her poor hygiene is most likely how she caught this infection. Not that I’m a doctor or anything. It’s simply common sense.

Excerpts taken from essortment.com:

What are the symptoms of impetigo?

Usually a cluster of small blisters or red bumps appears first at the site of infection. These blisters will grow and rupture within about twenty-four hours. The skin exposed when the blisters burst appears red and inflamed, and will often leak either pus or a thinner fluid, which may be clear or slightly cloudy. If the infection is left untreated, the lesions may grow quite large, and will almost certainly spread to other parts of the body. Over a period of four to six days, the lesions will begin to form thick tan or honey-colored crusts.

Who is likely to be at risk for contracting impetigo?

Anyone can get impetigo, but it is most commonly found in children, probably because they so often have cuts, scrapes, insect bites, or other minor injuries on their skin from playing outdoors.

Are there other risk factors for developing impetigo?

Because bacteria thrive in warm, moist environments, most cases occur during the hot, humid summer months. That is also the time when children are outdoors playing in shorts and short-sleeved shirts, so they are more likely to have small skin injuries that provide an opening for the bacteria.

Poor nutrition
, poor personal hygiene, unsanitary living conditions, or an illness that has lowered an individual’s resistance are also risk factors for developing impetigo.

How does one contract impetigo in the first place?

Bacteria live on the surface of the skin. If a skin injury is not kept clean, it is an invitation for those bacteria to invade the body and cause infection. Good personal hygiene helps to keep the bacteria in check, both as a preventive measure, and as part of the treatment schedule if one does develop impetigo.

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It has been decided that cutting yourself amidst large quantities of dirty underwear is not healthy.

Who knew?

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Published on March 4th, 2008 in Amy Winehouse, Celebrity Illness, That's Gross

Love It or Hate It?

Source: www.celebritysmackblog.com

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Former supermodel Carol Alt at the ‘Miss Pettigrew Lives for a Day’ New York Premiere.

Do you love her outfit - or not?

Those tight white pants…they’re horrific!

Published on March 4th, 2008 in Aging Celebrities, Carol Alt, Fashion, Models & Supermodels

KFed is KFat

Source: www.yeeeah.com

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Kevin Federline spent a little time on the greens in Los Angeles over the weekend. From the looks of it, he also spent a lot of time sweating and clutching his heart in between bites of a double-bacon cheeseburger.

Published on March 4th, 2008 in Britney Spears, Fat, Gossip, Kevin Federline, golf, kfed, weight gain

Jessica Simpson makes you “fun & fearless”

Source: www.derekhail.com

OH GOD

Tony Romo recently said that dating Jessica Simpson makes you “fun and fearless”. Whatever the hell that means…

“I was thinking, you have John Mayer, Dane Cook,” he said. “If you date Jessica Simpson, I guess you’re fun and fearless.”

That’s because Jessica Simpson’s vagina is probably lined with silk and her breasts taste like honey.

Romo’s remarks come after he spent a lowkey weekend with Simpson. On Saturday night, she gave him a lap dance at club Villa in Hollywood.

Since when is getting a lapdance from Jessica Simpson a “lowkey weekend”?! What the hell is exciting for this guy? If I had a weekend where Jessica gave me a lapdance it would pretty much be the weekend of the year. Hell, I’ll settle for a regular lapdance from a one armed midget stripper at this point. Seriously. If you’re a midget stripper with one arm call me.

Published on March 4th, 2008 in Jessica Simpson

Am I the only one who hates Oprah?

Source: www.derekhail.com

Oprah is pretentious

Oprah’s new show “The Big Give” kicked off as Drew Barrymore donated $1,000,000 to help feed kids in Africa. That’s nice and all but this show has got to be one big snooze fest. Just take a look at the promo.

I’m pretty sure only lonely housewives will watch this show, because no one I know wants to see people just giving money away. Let me get on that show and I’ll show you how to “give away” money. I’d buy 50 monkeys, get 50 prostitutes, give 50 homeless dudes money and lock them all in a room for a battle TO THE DEATH. Now THAT’S Prime Time Television.

Published on March 4th, 2008 in Oprah