Source: agentbedhead.com

Holy crap! It’s Superbowl weekend, and I’ve been rather knocked out with a virus and unable to commence my timely football rantings. Oh, but fear not, now all the hetero boys out there will still gather round the television set to watch men in tights knock each other over. That’s, like, really sexy.

Speaking of hot . . .

For the “Superbowl Shuffle” in its entirety and so much more, see last year’s Superbowl Is SO Fucking Gay extravaganza. Sadly, it remains the most highly-trafficked post of this website.

Source: agentbedhead.com

Jessica Alba’s latest film is a supernatural horror flick that proves, once and for all, any film starring the Alba ass is about as crappy and tasteless good as another. So, go read my review.

Source: agentbedhead.com

After more than a quarter century in the movie business, Nicolas Cage is talking about getting out. “Some movie stars look like they are having a ball, but but I’m tired of it. It has made me reclusive. That is an increasingly gnawing feeling in my body,” he says. Aside from the bitter lack of fulfillment brought on by a career that has made him roughly a kazillion dollars, Cage also suspects that some moviegoers can’t stand him: “For some reason, I piss off the audience. People who like me in one type of film don’t like to see me in another.”

Oh, come on. Nicolas Cage has made between fifty and sixty films. A couple of them were quite good, maybe six more were watchable, and the rest were things like Ghost Rider and The Wicker Man–two-hour visits to Suckville. The guy owns a castle in Germany, another castle in Ireland, has a son who looks like The Return of Ozzie Osbourne and another son, Kal-El, that wasn’t even named after a Superman character. (Nicolas named him after his dog.) If Cage isn’t satisfied with the fruits of his career, then he’s always welcome to move on. In fact, it might take a few years before people notice he’s missing.

Source: www.drunkenstepfather.com

Here are some Susan Sarandon showing off her massive old lady tits that have been around so long they have their own stories from the second World War . Reality is that I do not have an old lady fetish and thinking about their dried up, lacking elasticity, post birthing, used up cunts doesn’t get me off, but the simple fact is that pussy is pussy even if a woman is old enough to be your grandma and smells like polident and moth balls.

So if I am volunteering at the old folks home changing bed pans and scrubbing shit out of old lady asses and “accidentally” rub the right spot, and a bitch is like “stick it in my cooch” or their old lady equivalent term for cooch like “Tan Slacks” or “Model T” or “Black and White TV” or “Flesh Beneath My Girdle” who am I to say no. I guess if I get to cum and she can’t get pregnant, then it’s not really volunteer work at all and we’re all fucking winners in the end, and ever since I was a kid, I always liked winning. Unfortunately, life never worked out that way for me.

I don’t know what I am talking about but here are some Sarandon tit pictures….

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Source: www.drunkenstepfather.com

Here are some pictures of Tyra and the girls of Lezebel together hating men. I guess that’s what happens when a man breaks your heart or cheats on you or touches you inappropriately leaving you to fend for yourself in this cold scary man’s world until meeting other girls who were also fucked over by men to create a community with and change the way the world works.

I’m talking equal pay as men, equal opportunity as men all while hating men. Burn your bra because men don’t wear bras and do it for Tyra, the queen lesbian using her authority to trick vulnerable women to her bed by putting blinders over their eyes and those blinders are a bullshit cause like women’s rights.

If she was a man and not just the size of a man, using his authority, let’s say a school teacher, rallying with the hot students to lower tuition or something all in hopes of lowering their naked bodies onto his dick, he’d get arrested, meanwhile lesbian Tyra gets more TV show deals, more money and more desperate women throwing their panties her way.

I guess that’s just the kind of double standard that men hating women want and that would make me want to start men’s rights group but I never really cared about fair since my life has always been pretty shitty and unfair, I’m used to it.

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Source: www.celebritysmackblog.com

Source: agentbedhead.com

Sundance 2008 has come and gone with the usual flurry of much-hyped films and big-money deals. Somehow overlooked on the various top ten lists for the festival was Isabella Rossellini’s unique contribution: insect porn.

Entitled Green Porno, the collection consists of a series of shorts that look like a demented, X-rated version of a Saturday morning kid’s TV show. Isabella looks into the camera and says something like, “If I were a dragonfly, I would have compound eyes…” and her eyes are promptly capped by two multifaceted thingummies. After she transforms into whatever creature is under discussion, the films get racier and a whole lot more surreal, with comments like, “As a lady firefly, I would buzz about in the evening, lighting up the sky with my luminous ass.” Before long a willing partner appears, and Ms. Rossellini is showing you exactly how dragonflies or whatever do the nasty. “I would clean her vagina to make sure she would only have my babies…” (For extra kinkiness, Isabella always plays the male partner.)

The three films shown at Sundance featured dragonflies, fireflies, and spiders as Bugs Gone Wild. Audiences seemed to get off on them (in a manner of speaking, hopefully), and the Sundance Channel has commisioned five more that will let audiences get real closely acquainted with bees, praying mantises, worms, snails and flies. Isabella deserves credit for coming up with a genuinely novel take on the wildlife film, not to mention being one of the very, very few people to create a new sexual fetish. Like furries, only without the fur. And with a lot more slime.

Source: www.celebritysmackblog.com

Won’t someone go dressed as Britney Spears and have a little fun? Gosh, LA is boring.

Heh.

Source: www.celebritysmackblog.com

Online Videos by Veoh.com

Heidi Montag’s new single, ‘Higher’, hits iTunes on Tuesday and in case you are dying to know how sh*tty it is..have a listen. I’ll just say it couldn’t be any worse. Enjoy.

Source: www.drunkenstepfather.com

Here are some pictures of a drunken Lauren Conrad nice and messy on her birthday with her tits hanging out of her dress and her sober looking friend trying to save her from flashing her tits like a good drinking sidekick who loves ruining everyone else’s fun in trying to take part in the celebration with her on her birthday, even when it is via the computer like we were friends with her. I always hated those kinds of prudes who stop their friends from showing me their vaginas on camera for the website every fucking weekend.

Either way, this group of girls from The Hills are like the low budget version of the Lohans and since they stem from shitty reality TV shows and not from shitty movies, I can assume they won’t be around all that long, but little girls still look up to them because they think just being on TV makes you someone worth paying attention to and I guess I do too, because I am posting these pictures like they matter but I just encourage hard drinkin’ in party dresses. I am a pervert like that.

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Source: www.drunkenstepfather.com

More pregnancy tits making an appearance only this time they are on boring Jessica Alba. I figured I’d post them because you’re a pervert and a loser and you like her a lot more than you like other girls because she was in shitty shows and movies that comic book collecting losers into and I hate you for that is because I hate Jessica Alba.

So the problem with there being a lot more losers in the world than cool kids is that bitches like Alba get inflated egos and false popularity because the people who are searching her on Google are people you wouldn’t let sit next to you on the bus, or even talk to if they approached you on the street because their greasy chronic masturbating face in cum covered shirts scares you.

Either way, I saw a clip of Alba on Letterman earlier this week and they showed a clip of her from her new movie where she was in the shower and they had her naked body blurred out. When Letterman made a comment about it, she said the naked chick is her friend and that she doesn’t get naked in movies and I don’t understand what kind of actor can call themselves an actor without getting naked when the part calls for it. I guess the kind of actor with an ego caused by you, who now thinks she’s too good for getting naked unless it’s to dig her boyfriend’s condoms out of the trash to flip inside out and fuck herself with it in hopes of getting knocked up so he never leaves her.

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Source: www.drunkenstepfather.com

Here is Halle Berry rockin’s some See-Through because she’s a slut, proven by the fact that she’s got something cookin’ inside her uterus and it’s not an IUD it’s a baby.

I haven’t figured out why pregnant girls like wearing see-through shit but I can only assume it’s because they are so fucking big that it puts strain on the fabric of anything they own making shit see through, like whenever my wife tries to fit into her elastic band waisted fat lady jeans only to discover they don’t fit anymore and the seam in the crotch gets so pulled and the fabric in the inner thigh of her pants are practically invisible, showing off all kinds of things I don’t wish upon my worst enemy……

I guess it could also have to do with pregnant chicks trying to hold on to the thought of being sexy and showing all they can to get the same kind of attention their tits once did, or maybe it’s the complete opposite and they are just gave up on lookin’ hot and go out dressed the same way you’d see them dressed in their living room eating junk food watching romantic comedies, waiting to squeeze out that burden only to realize that once it’s out it’s a much bigger burden but at least your body bounces back to something worth fucking when you’re career depends on it…..

Unfortunately, the only bouncing my wife’s body will be doing, is up and down with every struggled breath she takes and not back into a relatively attractive dress size…..but that’s just the life I am living.

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