Source: yeeeah.com

Liz: Forget Madonna and Demi Moore. I’m the queen of all MILFs.

More pics after the jump.

Liz: Resistance is futile. Put your Black American Express card between my boobs and take me for a ride.

Source: yeeeah.com

Dean McDermott: Tori, aren’t you supposed to attend your father’s burial today?
Tori: Yeah, but first I have to tan my boobs.

More pics after the jump.

Tori: Speak to my ass, my head is ill.

Source: yeeeah.com

Kate Moss has penned a woeful poem in ex-lover Pete Doherty’s own journal, claiming the Babyshambles frontman cared more about drugs than his relationship with her.

“You love them more than you love me/So that’s why I could cry all day long/that’s why I can’t breathe,” the supermodel wrote. A British literary magazine published the poem after finding it in one of Doherty’s journals, which he’s using to write his autobiography. On one page, Doherty vows to quit drugs if Moss will marry him.

Neither has happened and Kate is now looking for another rocker. The only problem is that they all take drugs. She should seriously consider dating a violonist or a flutist for a change.

Source

Source: yeeeah.com

Actor David Hasselhoff, who is recovering after being injured in a bizarre shaving incident, says he’s thrilled to reprise the role of Michael Knight for the big screen version of the cult 1980’s show “Knight Rider,” which featured talking supercar KITT.

The star exclusively told Sun Online: “It’s great to be back as Michael Knight. I think other TV series haven’t been done so well on film – Starsky And Hutch was made into a silly caper. Knight Rider will be true to the TV show.” Hasselhoff also said he was flattered to be the king of cyberspace gossip. A recent poll by Pipex found that the Baywatch legend is talked about in more emails than any other male star, including hunks like Brad Pitt and Johnny Depp. He told us: “It’s an honour, a real honour. But to be honest I think there’s more stuff out there on the web about Knight Rider.” He added: “When I was in Chicago in the West End, no less than four KITT cars turned up. Some fans from Sweden brought their specially-made version of the car to show me as did some fans all the way from India.”

The Hoff is back, baby! And he’s ready to take coolness to new heights. If you don’t believe me, just watch the following video.

Source: agentbedhead.com

This week’s lesson in promoting global misunderstanding comes from the same creative geniuses who taught their Japanese audience all the English they would need to get successfully mugged. Now they’re explaining the phrases necessary for conducting a shrill, pointless argument. Presumably this comes in handy at the end of the summer, when you’re ready to head back to Yokohama and need to break things off with that gaijin you hooked up with at the start of your vacation. So: Are you ready? Good. Now—let’s begin!

Source: agentbedhead.com

Mariah Carey has embarked on diet consisting of mostly purple foods, because she believes that these foods will stop the aging process and therefore prevent her from getting wrinkles. Wait – isn’t that why she does the botox thing every few months?

“It sounds off-the-wall but it’s a huge injection of healthy food in one go. Purple products are nature’s best weapons in the battle against ageing [sic]. There’s a saying that ‘a plum a day keeps a facelift away’.”

One would think that Mariah is vastly limiting her culinary experience to just eggplant, grapes, plums, currents, raisins, but that’s probably not the case. She’ll probably direct her staff to import purple potatoes from Peru and Bolivia, just to maintain her youthful glow. At the first hint of diet-induced boredom, she might also have to resort to purple soda, juices, and Kool-Aid, as well as Jelly Belly gourmet jelly beans.

Once Mariah reaches the point of desperation, she may start consuming the man chowder of Prince (formerly known as The Artist, formerly known as Prince). The fountain of youth, indeed.

Source: agentbedhead.com

Aussie band INXS has seen decades of success and several albums, but their 1987 album, Kick, literally punted the band into the international mainstream. The ubergorgeous Michael Hutchence, who unfortunately had an unhealthy interest in autoerotic asphyxiation, displayed mastery in the art of seduction within this video of “Need You Tonight / Mediate.” Please ignore the fellow with the mullet and leather pants, for he ruins the entire effect:

Source: agentbedhead.com

In case you missed today’s episode of Passions, here’s the 411:

Tired of waiting for Kay to regain her memory, Siren whacks her in the head with a baseball bat. When Fox, Miguel & Tabitha come to her rescue, Tabitha accuses the mermaid of killing Kay. As Whitney prayed, a statue of the Virgin Mary came to life & told her that she’d gotten her miracle. An all-out war breaks out in the catacombs as Simone & Paloma lead a group of Roman lesbians into battle against Alistair & his goons. The lesbians help Luis, Ethan, Noah, Mrs. Wallace (previously swept away by a tsunami) & psycho-killer Norma Bates turn the tide. Alistair secretly pushes a remote control with a blinking red button…

Next week: Alistair unleashes vicious lions upon Luis & Fancy! An enraged Endora accidentally sets Tabitha’s house on fire!

Source: www.drunkenstepfather.com

These pics landed in my inbox, I don’t really do the whole nipple slip thing anymore and I try to leave it for the virgin webmasters, but this is no ordinary nip slip, this is funny cuz this fucking kid is hungry and it knows where to find lunch….I was walking around yesterday for an hour and saw at least 3 new moms feeding their kids. It’s the year of young mothers and bitches just pull their shit out anywhere baby wants. These are the same bitches that you had to take on 10 dates just to get a blowjob from, now that they have a baby they think it’s cool to show the tit cuz it’s no longer a sexual object, it’s a tool. I just want to say that I am down with that thinkin, cuz I don’t care how bitch views her own titties as long as I get them. I don’t mind seeing a little mouth and hand on it, I just pretend she’s got REALLY huge tits. That may have made sense and I am not re-reading it cuz i got places to be.

Source: www.drunkenstepfather.com

The Olsen twins have changed our society, I am sure eating disorders are more popular today than they were 10 years ago….but not for everyone, today I saw some fat slut in spandex behind me buying lunch. This is what she bought:

1 can of Beef Stew
1 Quart of Milk
1 Cookie
1 bag of chips
1 massive ice cream sandwich

Based on her ass, she won’t be throwing that lunch up, she’s saving it there in the event the famine hits before she dies of heart disease.

Source: yeeeah.com

Pamela Anderson recently stripped off to show that she would rather go nude than wear fur at PETA’s Humanitarian Awards. I’m also a big supporter of PETA. I told my two cats, my dog and my hamster to stop wearing fur. They didn’t listen so I shaved them. On a more serious note, don’t you think she’s getting a bit too old for that?

More pics after the jump.

Source: yeeeah.com

Keira Knightley revealed she begged director Gore Verbinski for an on-screen smooch with her co-star Johnny Depp on the set of “Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest.” She admits:

“I was saying, ‘Give me one kiss, just give me one kiss’. I got it and it was good – really good.”

I went to the “Pirates of the Caribbean 2″ premiere and when I saw Keira, I asked her to kiss me. But all I got was a smooch from Mickey Mouse. Damn you, Johnny.

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